Sunday, April 18, 2010

The Labyrinth Sans David Bowie

Is there anything cooler than a network of secret underground caves that has provided shelter for cavemen, ancient civilizations, medieval monarchies, modern age mercenaries, and now me? I can only think of one thing and that would be a network of secret passageways filled with bizarre muppet characters and David Bowie. Although I would love to visit the latter, I had to settle for the former, but I have absolutely no regrets. Well actually, that is not entirely true. As I was quietly navigating my way through the mystical tunnels that ran underneath Buda castle and its cobblestone streets, my mean spirited wife was conspiring against me and slipping behind a limestone pillar into the darkness. Never one to truly handle two tasks at once, I lost track of Mariana’s whereabouts as I read plaques explaining the significance of the caves during pre-historic times and made my way deeper into the labyrinth. Next thing I knew, a sly devil jumped out of the darkness and attacked me. My heart jumped into my throat as I tried to focus my eyes to see my adversary, but all I found was an evil woman with a malevolent cackle who strangely resembled my wife. Mariana will probably never let the fact the she scared the crap out of me go, but she hugged me nonetheless and told me everything was going to be okay. Five minutes later, I walked out of the dark labyrinth into the light of the streets above with my historical intellect strengthened and my manhood severely bruised.

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